A Coach's Tale: Chapter 6 The Contract

He took a deep breath and let go a long sigh.                  

“Agreements. Just another fancy word for contracts,” he mumbled.

Never had he imagined that being a coach would be so technical, so professional, so challenging. When he decided to pursue coaching as his next career, he expected one-to-one talks with individuals whom he would assist in finding the path they would want to take to reach their desired destination. Never in his wildest dreams did he imagined himself coaching individuals from a company or organization, working with clients and relevant stakeholders to create clear agreements about the coaching relationship, process, plans and goals. Heck, he wasn’t quite sure if he even understood the process and how to create a coaching plan!

Another sigh as he shook his head in disbelief.

To establish agreements to cover both the overall coaching engagement as well as for each coaching session, he realized, would require some strong, clear-headed and directed discussions with the stakeholders and potential coachees to be clear where everyone is coming from, what everyone is expecting and the reason(s) for summoning him and his services as a coach. For this, he was thankful for past careers which included board and planning meetings, public speaking and group discussions, all which he assumed would help him maneuver the exploratory meetings he was to have with the CEO of Everdabest Corporation, its HR officer and three officers who were up and coming (his potential coachees).

He took a long sip from his coffee cup, looked out of his office window and asked, “What on earth will I put in the final agreement? What will I, the stakeholders and the coachees need to be clear about and come to agreement on?”

As he wondered, he recalled his initial introduction to coaching as well as the general misconceptions many had about coaching. A lightbulb came on! “Yes, I will need to explain what is and is not coaching and describe the process I will use, the one the coachees will undergo and the stakeholders will be expecting me to run.” He quickly scribbled down words and phrases that describe what coaching is (a partnership, a dance of trust and discovery, a walk together on a path created by the coachee spurred by the guiding questions from the coach) and what it is not (not fixing problems nor providing solutions, not therapy or mentoring). He was thankful for the early lessons from his Catalyst class for this insights.

For the upcoming meeting, he realized he would have to present and explain the process he would be using with the coachee. He looked out of his office window again, watching the traffic below. Then it hit him. All the cars were heading to a specific destination, using the available routes, picking the ones most helpful to help them reach their destination soonest. In the same way, his process would basically be the route he would select to best help his client to reach their desired destination soonest. After a few minutes of deep thought and some scribblings, he decided on a diagram to illustrate his process.

 

He was rather pleased with his diagram but he realized there was much more to do. For instance, in the upcoming meeting, he would have to iron out with the stakeholders and his potential coachees as to what would be appropriate in this coaching relationship, what is and is not being offered and (the often sticky one) the responsibilities of his client and the stakeholders. He made a note and underlined it: Stakeholders MUST be part of the coaching relationship and responsibilities. I want them to be in constant communication with my coachees, following-up progress and encouraging them. He also made a mental note that he would need to clarify the relationship and responsibility expectation between him and his clients. “Much to put on the table and agree on,” he whispered “but when this is clear, I will be able to get on with business!” Saying this made him remember a mantra a wise coach of his often repeated: Specifics brings clarity.

All this thinking and preparation kept him in a state of stress but the cortisol and adrenaline flowing freely in his body helped him keep alert as he jumped into the next item on his agreement preparation agenda: agree about the guidelines and specific parameters of the coaching relationship such as logistics, fees, scheduling, duration, termination, confidentiality and inclusion of others. He took a deep breath and jotted down the following on his yellow A4 writing pad (he still believed in the power of writing things down):

• Fees – mentioned to the CEO, prefer a package deal opened to staggered payments
• Scheduling – first few sessions on a weekly basis and then maybe once in two or three weeks
• Duration: between three to ten months (need to finalize at the meeting)
• Termination – terms to be agreed but will allow certain conditions for client to exit earlier. Need to clarify in the meeting acceptable reasons for me and/or client to exit prematurely.
• Confidentiality – what goes on between me and client is confidential unless permission is granted to share; what goes in between me and stakeholders is also confidential. A general, verbal report on what I have done and progress of clients may be given after every four sessions to stakeholders if required and agreed upon.

“Phew, there’s just so much nitty-gritty details to cover. I hope I don’t miss out anything. Will need to listen carefully to those in the meeting to pick out any details I may have overlooked,” he thought as he stepped out from behind his table and sat on a comfortable blue sofa he had in the office. His butt-and-back rest, he joked when explaining the sofa’s presence. Sitting back comfortably he began to wonder how the overall coaching plan and goals would look like but he knew he was jumping the gun. He would only be able to craft this after speaking and listening to his potential clients and all relevant stakeholders, realizing all of them would have their own goals and expectations. Only when he was clear of everyone’s expectations and everyone comes to an agreement on what goals all of them would accept could he then draft an overall coaching plan. This he expected would materialize at the goal alignment meeting, scheduled several days after this upcoming meeting.

With this item ticked on his to-do list, he decided to give a call to his lovely and loved wife to see how she was doing. The call perked-up his spirit and added a bounce to his tired mind. He was glad that after all these years, the chemistry he had with his wife was always vibrant and exciting. During the call he discussed briefly with his wife his desire to have the right chemistry with his soon-to-be clients. “I will need to determine my compatibility with my clients and vice-versa. Without it there can be no thriving, open and trusting relationship. How on earth can coaching happen?” he explained to his patient wife. She then left him with a question he hoped he would have a better answer for the next time the question was brought up: What are the indicators you would use to determine your client-coach compatibility? The only answer he had was, “My gut feeling when I eventually speak to the client.”

What he was actually looking forward to was the time he would have with his latest clients to identify what they want to accomplish in the sessions he would be having with them. This was when they would be (or he hoped) real and honest with him and together, they would identify one or more goals that would make a big difference in their lives at the end of the coaching experience. For this to happen he knew he would have to partner with his clients to define what they believe they need to address or resolve to achieve what they want to accomplish in the sessions. He always found this exciting, the opportunity to identify a desired destination and then to partner with his clients to identify possible paths, select one and then agree on the steps they would take. He smiled, stood up and clapped his hands in anticipation of more lives being impacted by his coaching.

On the way back to his hard office chair behind his desk, he grabbed a stress ball he kept on the desk, a fun and necessary accessory to reduce the level of stress in his body. He was committed to this after he was warned by his doctor about keeping his blood pressure low. As long as the numbers were in the safe zone, he knew he was successful in managing his hypertension. How he wished it was as easy as that to measure his success with his clients. Hearing his Catalyst guru say that measuring coaching success was still a debatable matter in the coaching world didn’t help. How do you measure numerically and quantitatively the level of success of your coaching? The intangible indicators – client is satisfied and feels his/her goal was accomplished for example – seemed to be good enough but he knew in the corporate world of reports, ROIs and results, he would have to figure out some measurable indicators so as to be able to announce that his coaching was successful. The good thing, he reminded himself, was that he would be working with his client to identify the measures and to confirm with them if a goal was accomplished. The testimony of two or three witnesses confirms the act, as they say.

He had enjoyed his coaching sessions with individuals when he first began coaching. The clients trusted him and sought him out. Agreements were clear, simple and usually verbally agreed on. Each session was more or less an hour long and if they wanted to extend a session he was given the authority to decide either way. Even so, each session was directed and determined by his coachee’s already mentioned and agreed upon goals and if for whatever reason, the coachee would desire to deviate from the agreed outcomes, he would remind and review what was said and what was now suggested. If his client still insisted on a new trajectory, he was all in for a new path and all the adventures that comes with it.

But now he was coaching sponsored staff of a company, having goals to meet set by the stakeholders as well. It wasn’t as fluid and free as before. He then made a mental note: When formulating the contract, make sure it is mentioned that the coaching is conducted in the direction of the client's desired outcome unless the client indicates otherwise. What he was thankful for was the fact that each session would still be around an hour to an hour and half guided by the agreed goals. The possibility of partnering with these upcoming corporate big guns and to walk with them as they seek to improve themselves, learn new skills and become more effective leaders gave him goosebumps. What an honor.

Suddenly a familiar melody blared from his smartphone, ending his temporary mental ruminations. It was his longtime friend Andy who was having a rough time with his divorce proceedings. He felt sorry for his friend and spared a few minutes listening to Andy share what transpired in court as he spelt out all that was required from him to end the marriage. When he finally said bye to Andy, he remembered the advice his late mother had given to him about ending something. She said, “Without an honorable closure, we drag out endings to a bitter end.” With this truth reverberating in his mind, he pondered how he would partner with his latest clients to end the coaching relationship in a way that honors the experience. On his part, identifying highlights and transformative points during the whole process would be key as well as celebrating key milestones the clients passed.

Just at that moment, he remembered something. He stood up, turned around and picked a book from the bookshelf behind him. The title on the cover read ‘The Four-Fold Way’ by Angeles Arien. He quickly flipped to the chapter titled Honorable Closure and began to take notes. He wrote on his A4 notepad:

The ritual of Honorable Closure has four practices. Use these protocols to be good stewards of transition and to ensure you never take anything for granted.

1. Gratitude – a recognition that the coaching experience was a gift; identify the blessings and lessons learnt with a grateful heart

2. Positive Impact – the indelible mark on our lives made during the coaching sessions; how our lives changed for the better, how our clients were recognized and acknowledged for their contribution in each session

3. Challenge – what helped the coachee (and you) become stronger and better, contributing to our growth and development? How have my clients grown?

4. Reparation – this is an important time to review impact. Have we caused injury through fear or confusion? Will I have regrets if I leave important things unsaid or not done? Is there anything I need to take responsibility for?

Honorable closure requires good stewardship of relationships.

The bells of an old church near his office began to toll. It was a call to the faithful to attend the midweek evening prayers but for this tired coach it was a beautiful reminder that it was time to leave the office, to put aside all the demands of writing another coaching contract and to head home to rest and recuperate. Soon all was put away and he walked briskly out of his office as he pulled the door behind him shut.

Thud!

He turned around to see the signage on his door lying on the floor. He picked it up, gave it a quick wipe up his trousers and hung it back on the door. He smiled as he read the words carved on it:

COACH PETER DE RUN - Assisting you to be your best