Focus and Wheel of Life

It’s Christmas afternoon and I am outside my farm house typing this week’s assessment on Focus and The Wheel of Life (Web-torial 16). Another thought-provoking and potentially life-changing lesson, for both coach and client. Like all good salespeople, we should only sell products we ourselves have used, so it made sense then the focus of the lesson was on us but I believe this information is for our client’s use too finally.

The first half of the lesson was on the importance of the client keeping focus on the core issue being discussed and worked on. As a coach assisting the client to identify and acknowledge her key issue that needs attention, making this clear at the beginning for the client is important. “What do you want to focus on today?” is the vital and initial question to ask whereas “How is this related to today’s focus?” is a helpful question to reel in the client’s attention once a walk around the mulberry bush occurs.

The inability to focus on the matter at hand is usually termed a distraction and an interference to the present matter being targeted. On a recent podcast I heard, the person being interviewed drew attention to the etymology of the word ‘distraction’, stating that the opposite of it would be ‘traction’ (any action that leads you to accomplish a goal) as opposed to dis-traction (any action that leads you away from a goal). In a coaching session, traction is what we are seeking for, for our client and constantly pulling her back to the core matter at hand brings traction.

I am intrigued with the writings on Ellen Langer and she has a whole chapter on focus and distraction that I so happen to be reading presently. Here are some of her thoughts on focus and distraction which we could also incorporate as we seek to help our clients focus on the core issue:

Paying attention usually means focusing only on the matter at hand. Should our focus wander, we call it getting distracted. When we are distracted we are paying attention to something else; being distracted, in short, means otherwise attracted. When we are attracted to something else, here are some key questions to ask:

• What is so attractive about the alternative stimulus?
• What can we learn from that attraction?
• Can we add the attractive elements to the stimuli to which we want to attend?

Distractions is actually meant to provide us temporary relief from a discomfort we need to attend to. To tackle this, thinking about the problem differently may be the solution. We need to look more closely at those situations we find difficult, rather than blame distractions we opt for.

Focus becomes a problem when we try rigidly to hold an idea in mind. To pay constant, fixed attention to a thought may be a kind of oxymoron. A better approach is to notice different things about the matter at hand. This is called novelty. Changes in context or perspective leads us to notice novelty. As such the most effective way to increase our ability to pay attention is to look for the novelty within the stimulus situation

At the beginning of a coaching session, it may be good to discover what our client is presently focused on? Interestingly, we are either focused on something that can be categorized as negative or positive and never on both simultaneously. I also found it intriguing that we can select what we focus on – when this option is not utilized, our automatic mode is to focus on the negative (something to do with our primal mind and survival). Even so, I believe there is a need to focus on both the negative and positive aspects of the core matter being attended to as both sides help provide a whole and realistic perspective of the situation and possible actions that could be taken. The role of the coach is to guide the client to mentally focus on the appropriate matter to maximize awareness, understanding and solution generation.

So do we need extreme focus to attend to the core matter at hand? I do not think so. Instead we need to be open to inspecting and evaluating related perceptions, ideas and aspects of the matter being attended, constantly pulling our clients attention to consider all aspects of one matter at a time (session).

You may be wondering why I am posting this picture.

What are you focused on is what you see and can attend to.

Distractions disturbs focus.

Did you notice the animal on the chair?

We move on. Next on the menu was The Wheel Of Life, a clever invention to illustrate key areas of one’s life, helping the creator-user to visualize where she is at and where she would like to be (the GAP). It’s a simple concept of selecting several key areas in your life, scaling each section as you estimate it to be and see it visualized in a wheel format, in various (sometimes colored) blocks. An excellent starting off exercise to determine areas to pay focus on and goals to be set.

Also thankful to Google Serch for displaying a list of articles explaining how this Wheel is used in coaching and how it is a valuable and common tool in the coach’s toolbox. For record and remembrance here are the steps involved when using this Wheel as introduced by Coach Mel:

1. Select 8 most important areas in your life. On a scale to i-10, scale each of the areas in the wheel.
2. Ask: “If I focused for a year on these 8 areas, what will happen to the scaled diagram I created?”
3. When considering this, what are you observing of the marked wheel you created (trends, unexpected changes etc.)
4. Now select 3 areas for priority attention.
5. Set a timeline for this narrowed areas of focus.
6. Ask: “What are 3 immediate action steps I can take for these 3 areas?
7. Now select the one thing you could do that would make the biggest difference
8. “How desperate are you to achieve it?”
9. How about doing it in 3 months? I month?
10. “What would I have to do differently to achieve this in the time span I have given myself?”

I just love this step-by-step progression from the macro to the micro, all the time enabling the client to focus on the most important matter. It forces serious thought, evaluation and decision but once successfully acted on, would deliver the desired transformation.

Unbeknown to me, I had actually done a Wheel in November when I was considering areas in my life to focus on in 2022. I did an exercise that was to help me know where I should focus on (no mention of Wheel of Life was made). I did the questionnaire and was provided with a picture. The end. I liked the picture and kept it. Imagine my delight when I realized what I was given was a completed Wheel of Life! Now I know what to do next with the diagram.

Select 8 most important areas in your life. On a scale to i-10, scale each of the areas in the wheel.

Done

 

Ask: “If I focused for a year on these 8 areas, what will happen to the scaled diagram I created?”

Some areas remain the same, some show a slight increase and one or two show a marked increase.

 

When considering this, what are you observing of the marked wheel you created (trends, unexpected changes etc.)

Some areas are not priority presently though still important

Some areas are of concern and beg for attention

One or two areas I am thankful are in good health

 

Now select 3 areas for priority attention.

Career, Money, Health

 

Set a timeline for this narrowed areas of focus.

One year (2022)

 

Ask: “What are 3 immediate action steps I can take for these 3 areas?

Career – 1) Revive and set in order my HRDF training requirements and opportunities, 2) Plan launching career as a coach, 3) Close-shop on other odd and end ‘jobs’ I have been doing

Money – 1) insist and only do paid jobs, 2) get several paying jobs/contracts that will ensure a consistent monthly income 3) create a pool of financial supporters

Health – 1) Resume healthy eating regime used in previous years 2) work well with my doctors and have a better attitude/mindset for all my checkups, 3) resume mountain biking

 

Now select the one thing (from each area?) you could do that would make the biggest difference

“How desperate are you to achieve it?”

How about doing it in 3 months? I month?

“What would I have to do differently to achieve this in the time span I have given myself?”

I guess I will need the assistance of a coach to decide my answers for the last few questions.

 

Life .  .  . to be continued.